Dvbn

just when i thought i had reached the bottom of self esteem, i broke through!

Dvvb

im going to kill these bitches with my humility

kind of a beautiful day

We gotta regroup.  See what kind of ideas the guys come up with.

I've been watching a construction worker solitarily work on a unit, eating cookies—I mean, I'm eating cookies.   I think it's going to be a Sees Candies, from the stripes, the black and white 

- Exhibit A

- Hey, you read my blog!  I always knew it would be a girl with glasses.  Makes up for your lack of lettuce—I nean, 20/20 vision.

Goodass pork rinds.  Spicy. Stuff's pretty brutal. I should prolly get back on xanax, my wife.  we had some good times, baby.  see if that number still works

- Exhibit A

- Hey, you read my blog!  I always knew it would be a girl with glasses.  Makes up for your lack of lettuce—I nean, 20/20 vision.

7-11 cup's become my ashtray.  Butts, parts of the letter soaked in diet coke and some cement, parts are in various trash cans in case it's ever used in some trial, i wasn't too ceremonial, i didn't have time, i didn't burn it, i burned something else the other day, i was more clear headed, the evening, same traffic, park this slab, we'll find a way, like the bottom of confidence we'll break through, i enjoyed the freeway today, all my moves were correct, i was breaking celery sticks

so many good things

can't believe i was about to tell her.  good thing i tripped over myself.

Why haven't you given her The Bomb yet?

Well, because it's a bomb.

Lots of good things are happening in my head (tak tak) today, I don't have time to sort it all out.  Anemia cracked my top three, I think.  It's not even Anemia.  I have some live bootleg from Long Beach I've been listening to for the last few weeks.  Here, I got you some Diet Melo Yelo, it's supposed to be the best.  Ah, god bless your heart, Mr. Gandolfini.  

Really nothing like it, concerts.  Your band comes on, the first few notes, what's it matter they're just going to brush me off and start fucking, and it's one of your favorite songs.  Really nothing like it.

feel like beer and breakfast

shot check

brush my teeths, check

clothes, slept in em, genius

colone of the day: la nuit

album of the day: pink floyd mettle

cigarettes, where?

i predict small little screams all nights, yea i got something to say, against my TV,  this one show, advil pm, say what you want, is really for nighty 

I was trying to control things, even when I was trying to shut my mouth, I was still going in circles.  I'm glad I gave up.  I'm grounded now.  Always a certain freedom—that sounds good, write it.  Sentences are crisp.  It's a 12 step tenet, the control  thing, and that shit doesn't float my boat right now.  And make sure you don't forget the parcel of land.  For one thing, what the hell are they talking about?    But it doesn't matter.  Hard work made us quit.  But it just doesn't probably matter, anyway.  I scanned the book, I'm a genius.  I'm one of the pyschopaths it doesn't work on.

It's nothing now.  It's the space between people.

I ruined Babeness.

You're doing good.

Hope Platoon's on.  I like war movies cause it reminds me what a coward I am.  I should be passed out drunk right now.

i'll never get to do the things i once thought i may someday decide to pursue...wait, shut up, i'm reminiscing, i'm being golden...

...i'm getting gentle—shut up! ...i'm thinking gentle things...golden things, 

im being a golden color... and now, looking back—i can do that, now, now that it's all laid out, the gist of it, the clockwork and impulses, the sickness and pleasure—when i was young, i guess,  i always felt like i had this constant problem that i couldn't never solve.  I never really thought much about the future, you see...

it always seems to catch me off guard

i'll never get to be deep.  I guess I always assumed I'd end up deep, I'm embarrassed to say...like that i would write books about animals, only they wouldn't be about animals

I'll never be able to write about love,

i'll probably never be a rock star, at this point,

not a businessman, not a hustler,

not even the sweet connotations of a fool, nor the wisdom of the mediocre

.            , my longest winter, my giddiest spring, my most melancholy of autumns" and...and my laziest summer

it started off well enough

i'm stuck in here

this is that special time, where we put everything into perspective

it never ceases to amaze me, works to amaze, i mean

it's my time to shine, now

to put a nice little bow on the package, as it were

outside there's a boxcar waiting

...the dirty beard hahangs

Vgcc

That nervous breakdowns are like, what, water parks.

let's shoot some crabs, Zack

let's shoot some crabs, cause I'm 7 and eleven—

babeness is what?

I'm Babeness.

I'm 7 and I'm eleven.

Bvh

knock me out, please

Gvvv

J,

Bl j,

V.

Vbb n 

Cv.

Bb

fine don't even come back

i don't even think about you anymore

I've gotten better at math.  When I play blackjack, I don't have to count on my fingers anymore.