Real life Superhero at the Bar

-...there was this kid, he fell through the window in one of those high-rise apartment buildings.  I caught him barely halfway down, and he looked at me and said, "Hey, you're not Superman!"  I dropped him right there.  I was having such a bad day.  I tried to make amends to his mom everyday for a week, but she was having none of it.  I fled when she finallly called the cops and said I was trying to rape her.  I couldn't look at myself  in the mirror for a very long time.

- Hey, that boy probably died waiting for Superman to scoop him up.

- That was my intial reaction.  I over-reacted.  

- Hey, don't be so hard on yourself.

- You think?

- Yea, that kid was probably ugly.

- ...wait a minute—What are you saying?  It's dangerous to drink with you.

- Sit down, cavron.   I bought the last round.