Welcome, to Jenny ba-ba-ba-ba Spaghetti!  This is my court, this is a court of law,  and and this is my bailiff, professional basketball player, Rick Fox.  We have a lot of cases to get through today, so please make sure all the little pencils are returned to the bailiff—Rick make sure you get them all back because if I'm going to have to sit here and wait on a kindergarten scavenger hunt, I'm going to set some new scales for justice.

- (rick fox)All right folks, when you are finished filling out your papers, return the pencils with the paper.  The pencils come back with the paperwork.

  - (judge ashley spaghetti) All right, let's see here, plaintiff and defendant are present....That was a question! C'mon folks

- (Both parties). Yes, Ma'am

-And listed here are two names that the court has identified—so before we can proceed, can the defen-dant explain to the court the presence of two additional figures in the defendant's box? 

- (rick Fox aside to the gallery?). Come on lady, if it's not in your hand, then it's in your purse.  Let's check the purse, let's see it.  Oh, am I scaring you?  Here it is, next to your nitrate pills.  

- (judge approving) Good work, Rick

-(rick fox on old lady) ...wait, you didn't finish the rest of the form—here, you didn't even complete the form!   Return the pen with the form, or Lifeline won't save  you in time.  

(lifeline won't save you

slam dunk ur head to drown a clown (cmon lady, ill use your head to dunk a clown)?

-(defendent, Bertha Strong) That is my brother Flaco, and his girlfriend, judge—well they were there when—

-(judge)so that's Flaco, and aflaco's girl?  (Court laughs) 

-Yes he saw me get ripped off by—

-Hold on, now!  So these individuals are here as witness to the case?

-Yes.

-bailoff remove the witnesses from the defendant's box, so we can proceed.

-(Plaintiff). You're honor, i have written a list of 100 hundred lies that I can directly attribute under oath to the Defense Witness, the so-called—

-(judge judy) mr. Pietrznack...

-(plaintiff carries on) in hopes of demonstrating the arbitrary nature of ...

-(judge) Mr. piertrzinack!  I won't tell you again!

-(plaintiff...) ... Of said integrity

-(judge) i'll tell you you now, that while the fervor with which righteous citizens pursue truth and justice stands as a testimonial to the bustling spirit of progress and virtue inherent in our great nation,  order and procedure must be the buttress of our souls.  (gallery quiet)

- (rick Fox).   Let's get those pencils in, everybody.

-(judge) the court will decide and consider the arbitrary nature of all things submitted to the court, in time and syntax.  Now we have wasted too much time, we have a budget problem...and if you have finally found a good mechanic or accountant or spiritual advisor,  i'll still advise you that I will not have my court turned into a  Venezuelan hulu circus or  South African vuvuzela.